how I went to buy a drill and ended up with succulents

Why is it harder to spend money on a drill that I need and that I will have for the rest of my life than it is to spend the same amount of money on a haircut or a dress or a pair of shoes?

I’ve been pondering this question all morning, standing in the hardware store, examining the display and trying to decipher the feeling, and this is what I’ve come up with. A drill doesn’t really make me feel good. Actually, it makes me feel pretty incompetent. I don’t know how to use one so that the screw goes where it’s supposed to go without looking like it did three shots of tequila on the way in. But even before I get to that point — where I’m trying to keep the screw straight on its point as it goes in — there’s the standing in front of the display at the hardware store, wondering which kind to get because, really, I should have a drill. I should stop borrowing other people’s drills (which really means borrowing the people that go with them so that they can do their drill thing for me) and get my own. And maybe, maybe, if I had a drill, I would learn how to use one. There’s a certain point where pictures lined up on the floor are no longer a design statement, they’re just lazy.

So back to this morning and the hardware store. I’m standing here in front of a ginormous display wall of drills, trying to figure out which one to get. And I’m paralyzed by indecision. My first instinct is to go with the DeWalt. Why? My reasoning, I confess, is little skewed. I’m considering it because…well…it’s pretty. Laugh if you will, but pretty plays a part in it. And the DeWalt is pretty. It’s yellow. It fits in my hand. It’s a manageable weight. But it is the most expensive one they have. Of course it is. Because they know, those folks at DeWalt, that people like me are going to come in to buy a drill that they thought was gonna cost them around $50 and the guy is gonna tell them, Oh no, you don’t want that kind, you want the one that has…and then he’ll start listing all these features that I never felt I needed until now. Like a built-in light and a lightening fast rechargeable battery and…and..and…I just wanted a drill. Y’know, an electric thingmajig that makes the screw go in the wall and it also unscrews them from the wall. I felt sure that the decision making process was going to be between corded vs uncorded and that was what I was prepared for but, apparently, I should’ve done way way way more research.

Which is how I ended up with succulents. It looks like those pictures are gonna stay on the floor a little longer. Hey, it’s a design statement.

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